Friday, October 18, 2013

Battle Report: Jordan & Sean VS Greg & Thurston

            Armenneus Valthex felt more than heard the movement of the stones.  He knew these ruins with an intimate familiarity after having spent hours bolstering them.  He slid his Indynabula array from it’s place at his side and initiated it’s power field.
            Valthex turned sure to see an enemy although how they got past the Salamanders, who had secured the perimeter, he was unsure.  To his disbelief he saw nothing, until the air moved.  Immediately he began swinging the powered coils in wide sweeping arcs.
            “Show yourself you coward!  Hiding in the mists of the warp to hide your fear?  Face me and meet your doom!”
            “It is your doom I seek Armenneus.” The strong, calm voice was so close to his ear he thought he felt the hot breath that gave the words life.  It sent icy chills down his spine.

            Before Armenneus could turn, a series of blows rained down on his back and head, each one, jarring him viciously but his armour protected him.  He regained his balance and responded with a series of strikes that found nothing but air.
            Again blows slammed into him, but his armour held firm.  “You can not keep this up Armenneus.  I will find a chink in that armour of yours and it will be the end of you.”
            “How do you know my name?” Armenneus asked as he swung the coils of the array.  “And my armour is absolute.”  If he could get his assailant to speak, he would have a better idea where he was.
            The laughter that echoed off the walls of the ruined building was sure and full of contempt.  It pounded in his head and set his teeth on edge.  “It is not the armour that protects your body that I mean Armenneus, and it is FAR from absolute.  As for your name, I have spies everywhere and they feed me information.  There is little I don’t know about you Armenneus”
            That was enough, Armenneus had pinpointed where the voice was coming from and he sprung, full of rage he swung the coils of the array with lightning speed striking his foe across the chest and shoulder, who suddenly became visible, as did the others.
            In deep red armour stood the enemy, armour rent and melted, laughing softly, a traitor marine from and unknown origin as there was no livery other than the symbols of chaos.
            As the others advanced on Armenneus he heard the voice, still strong despite the wounds sustained, “Don’t kill him, Lufgt will need him.”
            “Yes, Your Honour.” Replied many voices in unison.

That there is the flavor text for this month’s battle report which was of Sean R and I teaming up to face off against Greg and Thruston.  A nice little combat happened between my warlord and his and it lent itself to move along some story and fluff and blah blah blah…
Now, onto the report.

On the car ride up, Sean and I talked tactics for a short while and I had decided that I was going to buy the Firestorm Defense upgrade then using my warlord trait, which allows me to infiltrate D3 infantry units, deploy as close to their lines as I can in the centre of the table.  So we deployed our forces in the centre of the table extending off to our left a little, leaving room for me to deploy my infiltrators.
Then Turston deployed his warlord way off in a corner with not that much around him, all vulnerable like and I jumped on the opportunity.  I knew that with Invisibility and a 4+ invul, plus the re-roll that the rest of my squad would give me, my warlord could kill his.  I only had an AP 3 weapon, and he has a 2+ save, but he only had to fail once because I have a force weapon.  So I deployed my warlord, a 10 man marine squad, and my 2 oblits, almost my entire army, far to our right side effectively splitting our force in 2 and making the 5RP I spent next to worthless.

First turn sees my marines rushing out in the rhino with the Chosen and Warlord not far behind but getting out of their ride ready to assault next turn.  Sean moves some things up and lets loose with his Vindicator which kills a couple.  Some other shooting sees some other marines die but there is nothing spectacular.
The other guys respond by dropping in 2 ironclads, 1 right in front of my chosen, the other right in front of Sean’s large mob of cultists which it flamed with it’s 2 twin-linked heavy flamers.  Thank the 4 gods there were only 9 in range otherwise 5 more would have died.

Now because of the sneaky way that Greg deployed his drop pod and dreadnought, Sean cant move his vindicator, so it gets a bad shot

I shoot up the dreadnaught and immobilize it and wreck an arm.  In the assault phase I successfully charge that coward Valthex and this is the result…

He is still standing.  Ok, no worries. He did nothing to me and I got next round to kill him.  In fact, I’d rather kill him in their turn anyway, I won’t get shot this turn.  YAY!

Greg charged his dreadnought into a unit of Sean’s marines, who gun the behemoth down in overwatch.

It's only his thumb you perverts!
The rest of the game is pretty average.  Stuff moves, then it shoots, and stuff dies.  One highlight is when I tank shocked 3 of Thursty’s units, twice.  He passed all his Tank Shock tests, but failed a death or glory with a lascannon.  I was hoping to get one unit at least because I knew I was sacrificing those rhinos.
There is one thing that happens for the rest of the game and doesn’t get resolved until the last turn of the game.

Thurston’s fucking warlord WILL NOT DIE, and he doesn’t even have It Will Not Die!!

Over the course of the game I inflict over 20 wounds and he saves them all, which means that his warlord is holding up over 400 pts of my army.  My warlord finally dies which opens up the rest of the squad to wail on him with a power fist and a power axe and get the job done at the bottom of turn 6, and the game ends.

There were a lot of would of, could of, and should of in this game, for me at least.  The main one being STICK TO THE FUCKING PLAN!!

Any way, I had a great game and had a chance to see why Greg gets Best Sportsman most of the time.

Until next time, happy gaming.

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Movember is Back!

 Lets face it nerds, we are not the healthiest group of people.  We spend too much time in our broholes, drink too much beer, and eat too much junk.

For the last 4 years I have been a participant of Movember, an initiative to get men to be more conscious of the health risks that effect them.  The main push behind Movember is to support the fight against prostate cancer, but it also bring to the light that guys in general don’t take very good care of themselves.  We tend not to go to the doctor no matter what the problem is and that is a sure fire way to miss something important.

How do we do this you ask?  Well, breast cancer has a pink ribbon, Movember has a facial ribbon.  Starting on Movember 1st, I will be shaving my upper lip for the last time until Movember 30th.

That’s right, for the entire month of November I will be growing a moustache!  If men’s health is something that is also important to you please help out anyway you can.  You can do this by making a donation at the Movember web site.  I have started a Movember team called “Mohammer”.  Please feel free to join it, or to donate to it.  If you don’t have any money to donate, please spread the word by growing your own moustache and offering your support that way.

If you would prefer to donate to someone else or to start your own team, that’s just as good.  You can go to

Let’s change the face of men’s health!

Hell, you might even look this manly...

But not likely.

Saturday, October 12, 2013

Mechanikon prep - Bastion

For those of you who don't know me... it seems my Mechanikon lists are never based on tactics... but more so what new models and toys I've recently built. So, that being said... The first person that says to me "Why are you using a bastion? They're only armour 14 and can be blown up. Aegis defense lines are way better.." is going to get punched in the fucking nerd dick.

I won some Eldar stuff at Duelcon 2 for being the worst player on day one. I was lucky enough to be able to trade it for something I could use. Most of their Space Marine stuff was sold out. I thought a bastion would could come in useful for terrain if I ever ran an event...

So... now I have a bastion, and I want to use it. So fuck you

I had a bit of a downsy moment when building this bad boy.. so there's a few small gaps. I added the gravel and sand to give it the rubble effect. Hopefully it works.

A slightly different angle and a Brittish swear word: Knackers!

Second layer of glue and rubble
But wait... there's more! Only assholes use GW Moonscape craters when a fucking 10 inch building is destroyed!

Measure once, cut twice. It's ruins for fucks sake. The more cuts the more ruined it looks!
Hmmm... it needs something else...

There we go... a perfectly good ruined bastion!
Now my wine is all gone!
Stay tuned for part II

Thursday, October 10, 2013

Jimcon 3

Jimcon is coming up fast and I have not seen very much advertising and the last time I checked the website is down.

I will be running a Warhammer 40K tournament this year on Nov 16th.  It is held at the Bronx Park community center, 720 Henderson Hwy.  You can buy weekend passes for $15 at several gaming stores(see their facebook event page for a list) if you buy before Nov 1st.  After that weekend passes can be bought at the door for $20, or a Saturday pass can be bought at the door for $15.  So if you're coming down just for the Warhammer 40K tournament then it's gonna cost you $15 either way.

It will be a 3 game tournament with 1500 point lists.  The only restriction is no Forgeworld please.  Missions will be Nova style missions, for those of you who don't know what that means...

Each mission will be made up of 2 of the book missions mashed together.  One of them is the primary mission worth 4 points, the other is secondary mission worth 3 points.  The tertiary missions, First blood etc., are worth 1 point each.  The player with the most points at the end of the game wins.  Matches will be determined by your record, and the points will be used to determine tiebreakers.  Games are 2 hours and the first game starts at 10:00.  Please show up at least 15 minutes early so I can get you signed up.